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· Registered
2,970 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
The NGEmu Short Funny Fanfics thread

The idea of this thread is basically simple. Create a short funny scene or a fanfic of anything
related to what is NGEmu. You can use NGEmu members as your characters as long as they're not
insulted or offended.

Here's a little something:

Pester Power

(Bobby on his NGEmu break talking to his 7 year old cousin, Sarah...)

Sarah: Big bro, I want a PSP but I dont have any money!
Bobby: Awwww...
Bobby: Sarah, because I like you so much I'm going to tell you a secret way to get a PSP..
Sarah: Secret?
Bobby: Yes, now pay attention. Because I will tell you the enormous, untapped buying power of kids just like you!
Sarah: Ooooh...
Bobby: Now Sarah, I will tell you the secret buying power of kids.
Bobby: It's called "PESTER POWER"!!
Sarah: "Pester Pow--ah"?
Sarah: How does it work?

Bobby: (Step 1: State the desired objective to your parent/s.)

Sarah: Mom, I want a Sony PSP!

Bobby: (Step 2: Repeat until desired objective is achieved.)

Sarah: I want a Sony PSP!
I want a Sony PSP!
I want a Sony PSP!
I want a Sony PSP!

Sarah's Mom: Bobby is evil...

Bobby: ("Pester Power" is a potent force in influencing buying decisions..)

Sarah: I want a Sony PSP!
I want a Sony PSP!
I want a Sony PSP!
I want a Sony PSP!

Sarah's Mom: Here! Here's your stupid PSP!

Bobby: (And in the end, everyone is happy...)

Sarah: I love you Mommy...

Sarah's Mom: I'm the best parent in the whole world...(sob)

(Warning! Using "Pester Power" abusively have dire consequences!)

Sarah: Thank you Mommy, for PSP.

Sarah: Now I want a boyfriend!

Bobby: (Those who abuse "Pester Power" are known to end up chained by their mothers to the basement!)

· Registered
2,970 Posts
Discussion Starter · #2 ·
I'm not even sure if my works are funny (or senseless.) but I'm so bored right now I cant think of anything right.

Here's a second one: ;)

Ngemu members are gathered to hear Kaiser Sigma's 'prudence principle' to the community.

Kaiser: I can imagine a place with no hate or racism...

Kaiser: A place with no war, prejudice, or cruelty..

All looked at Kaiser with skepticism and doubt, yet they were all amazed...

Kaiser: Then I'd Imagine we'll attack them, because they wouldnt expect it!

All turned their backs and went home...

C'mon guys add a little something, where's the humor in you? It's kinda awkward with only myself posting.

· Emunext fanboy
4,245 Posts
Cool that was funny :) . Specially the Kaiser one :p .
I guess I'll be posting some ;)

Edit 1 : Sorry kinda busy right now, but why not post some scenes from the chapters you didn't read from NGFight story ;)

*Copy/paste from the document file ^^

"Metalmurphy and Samor were heading to the Arena next day for the first match.

Metal : I must thank you for taking me with you in the car ^^ .

Samor : Well, we were both heading to the same place, how can I leave you waiing for the bus ? J

Metal : I know nothing beats the fighters and admins seats, but I’ve gotten the first degree tickets for all the matches :D .

Samor : cool for you.

The flash light turns red.

Samor : I just hate waiting.

Metal : It’s ok. We aren’t late, we have 30 minutes before the match begins.

Minutes passing.

Metal : Haaooom, now I know why you hate waiting L . But hey look at this gorgeous car next to us.

Samor looks to where Metal’s pointing. He opens his mouth in shock.

Samor : What a cool looking one. But isn’t that Lord Snow?

Metal : I guess that’s him, no wonder. He’s the one who can get that expensive beauty ^_^ .

The gorgeous car’s motor groans when Snow opens the window.

Samor : Well hello Snow.

Snow : Hello Mr.Samor and you too Metal.

Metal : Hey.

Metal leans on Samor’s ears, I bet you can’t compete with your car against his anytime :p .

Samor : WHAT?

Snow : ?! What’s up?

Samor : Hey, what about some entertainment?

Snow : What do you mean?

Metal : Samor. Plz, you aren’t doing what I’m thinking.

Samor : A race. From here to the arena.

Metal faces Snow, waving to him to get his attention.

Metal : Hey, Samor is just joking. ^^”

Snow : It’ll be my pleasure.

The Flash light turns to yellow. The two cars engines groan as if challenging each other. While the drivers close their windows.

Metal : What are you two doing?

Samor : Shh. I’m in one of my inspiring moments right now.

The flash lights turns Green when they both run full speed suddenly together.


From the first hundred meters it was obvious Samor’s car wasn’t capable of winning over Snow’s. Samor had to drive with all his might to stand a chance.

Metal : Look out. Man in the middle of street.

Samor goes right slightly avoiding the guy with millimeters, but losing his position 5 meters bhind Snow.

Samor : Pfft. Pedestrians these days. They make you lose races.

Metal : ??

Samor reached the maximum speed his car can get, yet he couldn’t pass Snow who was doing well.

Metal : I don’t think you can do thing about it.

Samor : Wrong :p .

He then makes a hard left turn into a narrow street.

Samor : I know a shortcut.

The high horn sound warned the ppl walking around. They ran out of Samor’s way, as every one thought he was going to kill them.


Samor wasn’t hearing Metal, that’s because he was thinking how to avoid the car coming in his face.

Metal : Damn, it’s a one-way street. AND WE ARE ONE THE WRONG DIRECTION.

The cars were going to collide, while the other car was losing speed thank’s for brakes, Samor never thought of using it. Instead he was trying to force his car to go over it’s maximum speed.

Samor : Come on.

He then goes over the pavement with the car ignoring screaming ppl around, and passing the car in the same time before returning to the road again.

Metal : Oh God. I’m alive, I don’t believe it. :cry:

Samor : The arena is just ahead of us.

Metal : Damn, you’re gonna make it.

Metal was probably right as all Samor had to do is to enter the main street turning in the U-turn and that’s it. But, Then they saw a familiar car just approaching the arena.

Metal : Damn, you aren’t gonna make it.

Samor : Wrong again.

Samor enters the main street but he doesn’t goes like other cars to take the U-turn, instead he just crosses the middle island between the two directions making the car jump twice before finally stopping.

Samor : See you later, Metal. I can drive you home after the match too ^^ .

Metal : NEVER. I’m not gonna go with you never never never , bohoho :cry:

Snow then arrives.

Snow : Well done, Samor. I must say I’m really impressed.

Samor : Anytime. It was a pleasure ;) .

The three entered the arena."

· Registered
2,970 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 · (Edited)
Thanks! Hey, I didnt know that there was an NGfight story. All I read was the Kaiser fantasy story you wrote and that one pratically inspired me. ;)

Here's a third story, Enjoy!

The Cursed Video

After watching The Ring 4 days ago. Samor, cloudvii and Kirby had only 3 days to live.

They went to NGEmu HQ, convincing anyone to watch the DVD so that their lives will be spared.

Kirby : Have Mercy! Watch this cursed DVD!

Metalmurphy : No way, Freak.

Kirby : I'll include my sexcapades manga vol.1 with it.

Metalmurphy : Hmmm...Make that vol.1 & 2! and I 'might' watch it..

Kirby : No way loser!

Metalmurphy : Then forget about it! See ya' in the next life! Nyahahahaha! :evil:

Metalmurphy goes away.

Samor : It's no use, we just can't get rid of this stupid cursed video..

Kirby : (sob) I didnt know my life would end so quicky..I should've watched less hentai.

Kirby and Samor were both hopeless, until cloudvii talked to them.

cloudvii : What? You guys are giving up already? Remember Pandora's box? The last ray of light.. It was "HOPE".

Samor :, what's your point..?

cloudvii : My point is, We should never give up!

"Suddenly, a green mysterious silhouette appeared.

Green silhouette : I admire your determination kid, but your statement is not credible enough..

cloudvii : Who the hell are you?

Boltzman : I'm Boltzman... and I can help you with your problem.

Kirby : What's with the green appearance? Are you some kind of a godly alien-like creature that'll answer all our questions?

Boltzman : Hmm..well, I can give non-falsifiable answers to some of your questions. but I'm not an alien, I'm just a regular businessman.

Samor : Cool.

cloudvii : ok, so.. How'd you help us?

Boltzman : Listen. Actually, all you need is an effective approach...

Boltzman : cloudvii, give me that cursed video.

cloudvii handed the cursed video to Boltzman.

Boltzman : Now, watch and learn..

Boltzman looks around for a possible 'target'.

Boltzman : Hmmm...This guy looks malevolent enough. (*grins*)

He approached the target

Boltzman : Excuse me sir, but may I interest you in some DVDs?

Kaiser : Hmph..Do I look like someone who has interest on moving pictures..?

Boltzman : No, unless its Porn.

Kaiser : Hurry! My mom isnt looking, Put it in my bag..


"Without the curse to bother them, the three went home happily. ;)

Samor : Great! Not only did Boltzman get rid of The Ring by selling them as porn,
but we got a free movie as well! :thumb:

cloudvii : Play the movie, Kirb.

Kirby played the movie.

Samor : Wait a min---This is the cursed video!


Kirby : Boltzman said it was porn... :laugh:

cloudvii went furious and strangled Kirby

Samor : I'd stop you from killing him, but what's the point? :rolleyes:


Kaiser : Hey Boltzman! I thought you were selling porn! but the video you gave
curses us to die in 7 days!

Kirby : You tricked us!

Samor : ....

cloudvii : Mr. Boltzman, not only you did lie to us but you also promoted piracy. You're not getting away with this.

Boltzman : Gentlemen, I am shocked to hear your complaints..

Boltzman : But, why dont you come back in 8 days, and not only will I refund your money, but I'll also add a $100 as a bonus? well, whaddaya' say? ;)

Kaiser : Hmm..Sounds good to me..

Kirby : Wow, what a deal!

Samor : and yet I can't help but feel that Boltzman is up to something...

cloudvii : me too..

· Retired
8,889 Posts
At least Sasuke didn't make me a comic relief in his story :p

Anyway, nice stories, Cloud and Sasuke. I would write some too, if I'd the imagination for this kind of thing :)

· Foundry/Foundation
11,824 Posts
King of Drivers *slightly based on a true story*


Cloudvii: Samor, I want to race against you, and I'm sure I will win.

Samor: Fat chance, you haven't had any practise. What makes you so sure?

Cloudvii: I'll be honest, it's no normal race..

Samor: So, what then? It doesn't involve cars?

Cloudvii: Oh, sure it does....

Samor: My car slower than yours? I can handle a handicap...

Cloudvii: Oh no, they're both the same type.

Samor: Well, what then?

Cloudvii: ...Rough driving is allowed...

Samor: Well, I can handle rough driving. It's no King of Fighters or anything ;-)

Cloudvii: You sure?

Samor: Definately.

Cloudvii: Well, see you at the race tomorrow then. :) It's at the stadium.

Samor: An indoor track eh? Good.

The next day, Samor travels to the stadium. However, as soon as he arrives his face turns pale.
"Welcome to the DESTRUCTION DERBY ARENA!" it's written with big letters on a banner hanging at the stadium.

Samor: *GASP!* H..hold on, that's not what I expected....

Cloudvii: Changed your mind? You still can! :)


The race starts, and the two cars head straight for each other...

Three days later, at the local hospital

Samor: ughh...uh...huh? where am I?

A familiar man walks into the room, carrying some flowers.

Cloudvii: They're for you. I must say, it was really brave (and a bit stupid) from you to try that. You know what happens when I get a bit carried away ^^;

Samor: Well, I could it possibly get any worse?

Cloudvii: Uhm, Pics are all over NGEmu....



· Foundry/Foundation
11,824 Posts
you're self-proclaimed No.1 Wierd News Poster , and I'm sure you're wasting more time than I did writing up what I did.
Aside from that, it was weekend. You seem to have time all week.

You don't know **** about me anyways, so better watch out what you're saying :mad:

· Registered
2,970 Posts
Discussion Starter · #19 · (Edited)
cloudvii said:
you mean we are going to die ? Really going to die :p ? I don't mind incase we will become some freaky ghosts scaring the rest of living ngemu members :evil:
Maybe I'll let Kaiser live, then you can haunt him :p

Player-X said:
So you guys have too much time after all
It doesnt actually matter where we waste our time. It's none of your business anyway.

Now, If you want to waste your time searching for ridiculous news. we dont care, cause that's your concern.
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