Joined
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185 Posts
MY life problem
I've been thinking of posting this message for so long & now I'm not
hesitated anymore in posting it & I hope you reply to this post by your
opinion & suggestion or any of them. Well the problem i face here is my love
problem i've gone through it with too many shocks, things can't be belived &
am about to complete a year now in this relation & we haven't MET yet .
yes this is first shock here the second one to you too i think it will be
anyway it is that my love is Rinoa of ngemu or higlander of kane's forums,
yes she didn't die as we ALL thought that was the first shock in my relation
with her after 5 days of her fake death news cloud told me that she is still
alive & that she contacted him to tell me a message that she is sorry & at
that time her story was that she was a witness in some big case & she had
to do that so that she be more safe. those 5 days were the most worse in
my whole life & no need to say how was i in them. anyway afterthat she
started to trust me or that what she was saying & she started telling me her
childhood life which wasn't happy at all & i won't say anything about that
cos it is not my right & she trusted me on it or that what i think. afterthat
she started saying a non-sense subject which was that she is not good
enough for me. First time i did understand it & i told her that i dun care
about her past life which was true cos she has nothing to do with it. & that
my love to her is over any other thing in this earth beside am not a perfect
person & i told her honestly all of the bad things in my charcter which she
said that they are very normal & the most big probelm is that she told me
she is very rich after along time of telling each other that we love each,
anyway the problem is that am not the kind of guys who depend on their
wives & i dun like depending on other ppl in big things only generaly,and am
still starting my life. she convinced me that this is nothing & that is not a big
deal & i beleived her & kept going on. After this she promised she will come
to my country she gave me a date then she get a new story & excused &
gave me another date after another month & then another excuse & i
haven't met her till now. anyway from about 4 or 5 months she came to my
country & she talked to me on the phone & set a meet. i was flying in the
sky this time i waited with cloud & another freind for her to come for 3 hours
in the cold & nothing so we left & that night she came online & apologized &
i accepted it as usual. then an imaginary all i can say it can be a good
action movie i won't talk about it for same reason i stated before & guess
what i beleived it & lived all it's hard days till it ended. after that from about
3 months she disappered for more than a month i tried to contact her. she
gave me her home tel. no. & she told me her mail password from a very long
time before that. i couldn't talk to her through the phone bec. i dun have
much money for it so i tried to get into her mail using the password to get
the first shock that she changed the password (she knows my old password
too) anyway i started to get suspicious cos i was mailing her more than 3
times a day without any reply i was very worried so i got onto her mail to
get the big shock, she was recieving my mails & reading them without
replying to me not just that but also adding my mails to spam folder & the
largest shock that time she was supposed to be in my country, i finded out
that she was talking to another guy from england who was welcoming her
back to london.........At this i got so mad & i told bad things about her
everywhere (am not happy about that) then she showed up the day i sent
to her that mail saying that i did find that out, she told me another one of
her stories that she wasn't the one who were using the mail & she was in my
country all that time & that this guy is a gay not a normal person lab lab
la....anyway i didn't beleive her but my love to her was over even this so i
did overcome this then she did a stupid thing or that what she acted to do
(am not sure of anything), she commited sucide(overdosed) & thanks to god
she was saved by her brother & uncle. anyway also this was another horrible
week cos as i was told she was in a comma. & the reason for her to do this
is bec. i wasn't trusting her what a reason lol. made me feel guilty all time.
as usual i forgived her & after a short time i faced a big problem in my REAL
life which i was about to be in the streets any second so ofcourse i
contacted all i know for help who can help of them &.....well she
disappeared after that mail too again. in a time i was in need for the help of
any person on earth the most person i love & i trust wasn't there for me.
anyway i dunno why but i wasn't surprised & as usual too i got over that
problem alone with the help of god ofcourse. then she showed up again
saying she is not good enough for me again which was at a very damn time,
cos i was facing a probelm can take my life away another one can destroy
my life & now her too, i was going on with just simple words she says to me
when we talk & really am not trying to maximaize what i was facing cos it
was really horrible & she knows them & i won't talk about them so dun ask
plz. Now she disappeared again from about 2 weeks, thanks to god i got
over the 2 problems one forever another all my choice is to wait more to
solve it & i have no other choices so am waiting. but the problem am writing
all of this to take ur sugestion about is that My stupid heart says to me
keep going on with her she loves you she is just facing problem & my brain
saying she is a big lier playing me but why she is doing that if that is true???
what did i do to deserve that?? I know she will read this so she can reply to
you all to defend herself, there is another member here more than cloud
knows that she is alive i won't say his name so that he has the choice
wether to talk or not, & i know she was talking to him much too. am waiting
patiently for your replies & for this guy if he dun mind & for your's Rinoa.
about me now am recollecting myself again but still can't get her out of my heart.
I've been thinking of posting this message for so long & now I'm not
hesitated anymore in posting it & I hope you reply to this post by your
opinion & suggestion or any of them. Well the problem i face here is my love
problem i've gone through it with too many shocks, things can't be belived &
am about to complete a year now in this relation & we haven't MET yet .
yes this is first shock here the second one to you too i think it will be
anyway it is that my love is Rinoa of ngemu or higlander of kane's forums,
yes she didn't die as we ALL thought that was the first shock in my relation
with her after 5 days of her fake death news cloud told me that she is still
alive & that she contacted him to tell me a message that she is sorry & at
that time her story was that she was a witness in some big case & she had
to do that so that she be more safe. those 5 days were the most worse in
my whole life & no need to say how was i in them. anyway afterthat she
started to trust me or that what she was saying & she started telling me her
childhood life which wasn't happy at all & i won't say anything about that
cos it is not my right & she trusted me on it or that what i think. afterthat
she started saying a non-sense subject which was that she is not good
enough for me. First time i did understand it & i told her that i dun care
about her past life which was true cos she has nothing to do with it. & that
my love to her is over any other thing in this earth beside am not a perfect
person & i told her honestly all of the bad things in my charcter which she
said that they are very normal & the most big probelm is that she told me
she is very rich after along time of telling each other that we love each,
anyway the problem is that am not the kind of guys who depend on their
wives & i dun like depending on other ppl in big things only generaly,and am
still starting my life. she convinced me that this is nothing & that is not a big
deal & i beleived her & kept going on. After this she promised she will come
to my country she gave me a date then she get a new story & excused &
gave me another date after another month & then another excuse & i
haven't met her till now. anyway from about 4 or 5 months she came to my
country & she talked to me on the phone & set a meet. i was flying in the
sky this time i waited with cloud & another freind for her to come for 3 hours
in the cold & nothing so we left & that night she came online & apologized &
i accepted it as usual. then an imaginary all i can say it can be a good
action movie i won't talk about it for same reason i stated before & guess
what i beleived it & lived all it's hard days till it ended. after that from about
3 months she disappered for more than a month i tried to contact her. she
gave me her home tel. no. & she told me her mail password from a very long
time before that. i couldn't talk to her through the phone bec. i dun have
much money for it so i tried to get into her mail using the password to get
the first shock that she changed the password (she knows my old password
too) anyway i started to get suspicious cos i was mailing her more than 3
times a day without any reply i was very worried so i got onto her mail to
get the big shock, she was recieving my mails & reading them without
replying to me not just that but also adding my mails to spam folder & the
largest shock that time she was supposed to be in my country, i finded out
that she was talking to another guy from england who was welcoming her
back to london.........At this i got so mad & i told bad things about her
everywhere (am not happy about that) then she showed up the day i sent
to her that mail saying that i did find that out, she told me another one of
her stories that she wasn't the one who were using the mail & she was in my
country all that time & that this guy is a gay not a normal person lab lab
la....anyway i didn't beleive her but my love to her was over even this so i
did overcome this then she did a stupid thing or that what she acted to do
(am not sure of anything), she commited sucide(overdosed) & thanks to god
she was saved by her brother & uncle. anyway also this was another horrible
week cos as i was told she was in a comma. & the reason for her to do this
is bec. i wasn't trusting her what a reason lol. made me feel guilty all time.
as usual i forgived her & after a short time i faced a big problem in my REAL
life which i was about to be in the streets any second so ofcourse i
contacted all i know for help who can help of them &.....well she
disappeared after that mail too again. in a time i was in need for the help of
any person on earth the most person i love & i trust wasn't there for me.
anyway i dunno why but i wasn't surprised & as usual too i got over that
problem alone with the help of god ofcourse. then she showed up again
saying she is not good enough for me again which was at a very damn time,
cos i was facing a probelm can take my life away another one can destroy
my life & now her too, i was going on with just simple words she says to me
when we talk & really am not trying to maximaize what i was facing cos it
was really horrible & she knows them & i won't talk about them so dun ask
plz. Now she disappeared again from about 2 weeks, thanks to god i got
over the 2 problems one forever another all my choice is to wait more to
solve it & i have no other choices so am waiting. but the problem am writing
all of this to take ur sugestion about is that My stupid heart says to me
keep going on with her she loves you she is just facing problem & my brain
saying she is a big lier playing me but why she is doing that if that is true???
what did i do to deserve that?? I know she will read this so she can reply to
you all to defend herself, there is another member here more than cloud
knows that she is alive i won't say his name so that he has the choice
wether to talk or not, & i know she was talking to him much too. am waiting
patiently for your replies & for this guy if he dun mind & for your's Rinoa.
about me now am recollecting myself again but still can't get her out of my heart.