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AKA snkmad
Joined
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4,030 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
How do I uninstall Wife and re-install Girlfriend?
Question:
Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed the new program contained the module Baby 2.0 which unexpectedly began child processing. This module requires significant space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run independently. When attempting to run the programs outside of Wife 1.0, the system crashes. How can I keep wife 1.0 in the background while running my favorite programs?

I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but I cannot find the uninstall module for Wife. 1.0.

Please Help!
Thanks,

A Troubled User

Answer:
Dear Troubled User:

What you are experiencing is a very common problem. Many users have upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program.

IT IS NOT...

Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run EVERYTHING!

It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. Once the files are installed, they cannot be deleted.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 as Wife 1.0 is designed to block any attempts. PLEASE consult Wife 1.0 manual, Chapter 7 (Warnings) sec. 9 (Alimony/Child Support).

We recommend you retain Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation.

The background application “Yes Dear” has proven to be very helpful in alleviating software conflicts.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:APOLOGIZE, as ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal function. Please note the “Apologize” command does not always take effect immediately.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. If you haven’t explored the full benefits of Wife 1.0 we suggest you load the support package which contains; clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

Be very careful how you use these support programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to Purchase additional software. We recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!

One final note:

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary with Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,

Tech Support
 

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The Hunter
Joined
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15,879 Posts
Replace Girlfriend 7.0 with Downloaded album and Wife 1.0 with Sony Album and it suddenly makes sense as well ;)
 

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[Insert Ad Here]
Joined
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333 Posts
Man that sony rootkit would work wonders for this.

-Install sony's rootkit in wife 1.0

-Download hot teen 6.9 and rename it $sys$

-Enjoy hot teen 6.9 without detection from wife 1.0 :p
 

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Psychotic Robot Master
Joined
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1,478 Posts
Kazuya Mishima said:
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
what he said :D
 

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band
Joined
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4,912 Posts
Dear Tech Support:

Recently I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes to the accounting software, severely limiting access to wardrobe, flower, and jewelry applications that operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalls many other valuable programs such as DinnerDancing 7.5, CruiseShip 2.3, and OperaNight 6.1 and installs new, undesirable programs such as PokerNight 1.3, SaturdayFootball 5.0, Golf 2.4, and ClutterEverywhere 4.5. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and invariably crashes the system. Under no circumstances will it run DiaperChanging 14.1 or HouseCleaning 2.6. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix Husband 1.0, but this all-purpose utility is of only limited effectiveness.

Can you help, please!!
Sincerely, XXX

Dear XXX:

This is a very common problem women complain about, but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 with the idea that Husband 1.0 is merely an ENTERTAINMENT package.

However, Husband 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and was designed by its creator to run as few applications as possible. Further, you cannot purge Husband 1.0 and return to Boyfriend 5.0, because Husband 1.0 is not designed to do this. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Boyfriend 5.0 to emulate Husband 1.0, so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system, once installed. Any new program files can only be installed once per year, as Husband 1.0 has severely limited memory. Error messages are common, and a normal part of Husband 1.0.

Having Husband 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults [GPFs]. This is a wonderful feature of Husband 1.0, secretly installed by the parent company as an integral part of the operating system. Husband 1.0 must assume ALL responsibility for ALL faults and problems, regardless of root cause. To activate this great feature enter the command "C:\I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME". Sometimes Tears 6.2 must be run simultaneously while entering the command. Husband 1.0 should then run the applications Apologize 12.3 and Flowers/Chocolate 7.8.

TECH TIP!

Avoid excessive use of this feature. Overuse can create additional and more serious GPFs, and ultimately YOU may have to give a C:\I APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal operations. Overuse can also cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5 or worse yet, to Beer 6.0. Beer 6.0 is a very bad program that causes Husband 1.0 to create FatBelly files and SnoringLoudly wave files that are very hard to delete. Save yourself some trouble by following this tech tip!

Just remember, the system will run smoothly, and take the blame for all GPFs, but because of this fine feature it can only intermittently run all the applications Boyfriend 5.0 ran. Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. Consider buying additional software to improve performance. I personally recommend HotFood 3.0, Lingerie 5.3, and Patience 10.1. Used in conjunction, these utilities can really keep Husband 1.0 running smoothly.

After several years of use, Husband 1.0 will become familiar and you will find many valuable embedded features such as FixBrokenThings 2.1, Snuggling 4.2, and BestFriend 7.6. A final word of caution! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install MotherinLaw 1.0. This is not a supported application and will cause selective shutdown of the operating system. Husband will run only Fishing 9.4 and Hunting 5.2 until MotherinLaw 1.0 is uninstalled. I hope these notes have helped. Thank you for choosing to install Husband 1.0, and we here at Tech Support wish you luck.
From a similar joke.
 

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InnarX
Joined
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2,756 Posts
Well, a potential solution would be to:

1.) Backup UrLife v1.0

2.) Format UrRoot Drive, releasing Wife vX.X

Somehow, this may not work....:p

r2rX :D
 

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AKA snkmad
Joined
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4,030 Posts
Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Whats Sony rootkit?
 

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Canadian Spaceman
Joined
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8,767 Posts
zman982 said:
Man that sony rootkit would work wonders for this.

-Install sony's rootkit in wife 1.0

-Download hot teen 6.9 and rename it $sys$

-Enjoy hot teen 6.9 without detection from wife 1.0 :p
lol

Sounds like a job for vmware.
 
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