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The ChinaDude!!!
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3,930 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
[warning: this user is mentally challenged, and not all of this story might be truth or fiction at the same time]

It was October 2004. I woke up one day in that particular month and was getting ready for work. WHOAH nice boobs there... i hung all night upside down so my balls hung were boobs would hang normally. After getting my balls back down, i get dressed for making pr0n movies, and leave the house. On my way to work, in which i have to travel through zombie hordes with something that looks like a tank and hurts just as much, i just killed a lot of zombies. Next day, i noticed the sun dropped about 1 hour, and the next day, the sun wasn't even above the horizon. The sun shifted more than 2 hours in 2 days. This combined with the evil wind that i felt on the third day made me feel really creepy. Zombies were spawning like mad. I knew even my patented shotgun glove would not kill them all.

So i cried like a baby. :D God heard my cries, and made the weather really creepy. Tsunamis to kill zombie hordes. Melting icecaps to kill zombie whales. tornado's to kill zombie yanks. Floods and excessive rains to kill zombies in training. The weather really seemed out of place. In the same time, some big shot was keeping a certain zombie alive. Why he did this, nobody knew. Some conspiracy theorists would see it as an effective way to divert attention from his killing other zombies. :wave:

either way, back to my story. It seems the zombie invasion was over. On top of the piles of undead dead bodies, i claimed victory. Little did i know the final boss would show up... Doctor Phil zombie edition. He immediatly started whining i was a ***** for my family and should go back to normal family life, instead of being fulltime zombie slayer. I almost got suckered into his pace. but then i remembered, i really hate his guts, so let him feel my reasoning called lead. So what happened next? I went to neverland and shot a human... zombies can't be zombiefied anymore. He was quite scary... his nose kept falling off. He stood up so i shot his nose, he started throwing zombie kids at me. I threw his sister at him. He got so scared after seeing her nipple(which isn't all that impressive) he immediatly returned to the grave. :thumb:

Well, i cleansed the west of the zombie invasion, but the middle east was still beyond my reach. And will be too. I oughta start my own task force and make a global zombie killing taskforce. :guitar:

Moral of this story: don't drink too much coffee :evil:
 

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Heretic
Joined
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2,766 Posts
Errh... I don't get it. But I guess you would have needed to drink a lot of coffee to be bothered to write that.
 

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!!!METAL UNCLE!!!
Joined
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1,951 Posts
You have posted something similar before, have you? Good story! :lol:
 

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The ChinaDude!!!
Joined
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3,930 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Vanit said:
Errh... I don't get it.
AND YOU NEVER WILL :evil:

(warning, sentence above copyrighted by Bash.org)
 

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The Hunter
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15,879 Posts
Almost as insane as the pictures :bow: :D
 

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!!!METAL UNCLE!!!
Joined
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1,951 Posts
Cid Highwind said:
Almost as insane as the pictures :bow: :D

Be carefull. Never ever give madmen any ideas, he might even post them. :p
 

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The ChinaDude!!!
Joined
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3,930 Posts
Discussion Starter · #9 ·
MaZa said:
Be carefull. Never ever give madmen any ideas, he might even post them. :p
"Do not feed the maniac... EVER"
:lol:
 

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!!!METAL UNCLE!!!
Joined
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1,951 Posts

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The ChinaDude!!!
Joined
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3,930 Posts
Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Player-X noticed: let's get rid of the evidence.

/me shoots player-x when he ran out of ammo
 

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The Hunter
Joined
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15,879 Posts
MaZa said:
Be carefull. Never ever give madmen any ideas, he might even post them. :p
He can't surprise me anymore, I've seen it all before :rolleyes:
 

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The ChinaDude!!!
Joined
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3,930 Posts
Discussion Starter · #14 ·
Cid Highwind said:
He can't surprise me anymore, I've seen it all before :rolleyes:
Can you say goatse? :evil:
 

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The Hunter
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15,879 Posts
Eface said:
Can you say goatse? :evil:
I challenge you to shock us within the limits of what this site allows :eek:nthepull
 

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Transcended
Joined
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1,416 Posts
Cid Highwind said:
I challenge you to shock us within the limits of what this site allows :eek:nthepull
Holy mother of.... please don't provoke Eface..... Have you forgotten?? Who KNOWS what else his twisted mind came come up with next?


/me hides underneath a solid bunker for the next week or so
 

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The Hunter
Joined
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15,879 Posts
Kraelis said:
Holy mother of.... please don't provoke Eface..... Have you forgotten?? Who KNOWS what else his twisted mind came come up with next?


/me hides underneath a solid bunker for the next week or so
Don't worry, I'm just trying to take care of the n00b and spam problem in an unorthodox way :evil:
 

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The ChinaDude!!!
Joined
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3,930 Posts
Discussion Starter · #19 ·
player-x, you mean you never brought a nuke to kill a mosquito?

You really think too small :evil:
 

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The Hunter
Joined
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15,879 Posts
Player-X said:
While making a few normal members leave as well, it's like fixing a small termite infestation by burning the city
Ey at least you can leave the city for a moment as you know it's going to be on fire. Just stay away from the thread. We will lure the n00bs in with something like 'get yer PS2 bios here' while we all know it's safer for our own mental health not even to check the n00bs' reactions ;)

And Eface, now you're scaring me again with that Nuke... Holland ain't that big you know :p
 
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